"Meeting is by chance, Friendship is by choice, but not even gravity can explain falling in love" Albert Einstien
Most people can recall every time they have had the L word trotted out to them. Usually we never think of the WHY behind the usage of that word. Well not until the relationship that spawned the release of the word is over. Thinking about it, the retience to ask why is probably just as well - cause it does seem jolly impolite to say "excuse me WHY did you say that exactly?". Kind of kills the mood. Pity, cause it would be good to know exactly what it is that tips someone over from Like to Love. And I use the reference to tipping knowingly as they don't call the transition of emotional connection falling for nothing! When we use the term "fall" we mean to imply that the process is in some way uncontrollable, risky, and inevitable .
We think it to be part of a global human condition, but it's not really. It's a western concept really. Even though love is a human condition regardless of our geography -the concept of moving from a feeling of neutrality towards a person to one of love, in the way we in the west do … well that is peculiar to us. Probably because of the random ways couples come together in western society, those who have this condition are almost certainly in a state of vulnerability. Add to this that falling in love is caused or is at least contributed to by proximity, similarity and reciprocity - the three factors that release the highest amount of endorphins in us when we were children. No wonder there is almost a childlike blissed out state in which those in the early stages of being in love. Which is why grilling someone about why it is they have "fallen" for you is a guaranteed path to someone throwing their toys out the pram!
Thus today, it was jolly nice to hear how the most recent person to trot out the L word to me had managed to get himself into this condition. It was hardly inevitable - we hardly know each other. Certainly proximity didn't come to play as we live in different countries. Similarity had nowt to do with it either (being that he works maintaining ships and maritime equipment whereas I put words on screens). And as for reciprocity - I'm a little hard to read (to put it mildly).
I decided to risk killing 'the mood'… because Jax being Jax, I had already manage to break practically every other rule in the 'How to Perform in the Early Stages of a Relationship' book. But there it was... that big fat four letter word and whilst I'm happy departing from the rule book...lets face facts he was trotting out the L word FAR too early for anyone's thinking. So I had to ask... what was it that made him decide not only to pursue this particular target (Cause lord knows there are much simpler paths to take).. and what the hell convinced him that it's "Time".
Well the answer (even though I'd run the scientific formula through my head and calculated that what ever he said it wouldn't be exactly what I'd expected to hear) was still totally unexpected.
"A distinct lack of anything that has ever passed before"
And you know what... I'll buy that.
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