“That's not a lie, it's a terminological inexactitude. Also, a tactical misrepresentation.”
Alexander Haig
No one wants to admit that they are a LIAR. We'd all much rather say we are occasionally disingenuous (not candid or sincere) with the information we give. It's referred to as “careful speaking”. Apparently 'careful speaking' is distinct from lying in that the speaker simply wishes to avoid imparting certain information or admitting certain facts but goes out of their way not to lie when doing so. Careful speaking involves using carefully-phrased statements to give a 'half-answer': one that does not actually 'answer' the question, but still provides an appropriate, accurate, answer based on what they've been asked.
BULLCRAP!!!
Lying is lying.
'Careful speaking' sounds a little like what politicians do... restrain from telling the whole story. Why would that be? To manipulate the reception of the truth. Which means you are not actually telling the truth.
And if you are NOT telling the truth.... you are lying.
Of course we all have wonderful motives for why we don't tell the truth. Most of these motives are in fact for the greater good. I recall only to well when I asked "Does this dress make me look fat" that the totally truthful answer "No.. it's your fat that makes you look fat", did not go down too well!
However, it made me wonder....What would the world be like if we all told the truth all the time?
Here's the top twenty ways people avoid telling the truth... and the JaxWorld alternative (the total truthzone): what we WOULD say if we really all told the TRUTH. The WHOLE truth... and NOTHING but the truth.
1.Compliments and false reassurances
White lies or exaggerations intended to placate the other person."That looks very nice on you" to a friend in a new dress. "Help will arrive in a minute", to a friend impaled on a fence.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Actually, that is categorically the worst outfit I have ever seen anyone in.”
“The ambulance will arrive... but after you are dead”
2. Bluffing
To bluff is to pretend to have a capability or intention one does not actually possess. Commonly used in work situations where, rather than admit to having a lack of skill or understanding an employee will bluff. In gaming situations bluffing is consented to in advance by the players and is acceptable and is commonly expected as a tactic.
Or in the total truthzone...
“No Sir... not a clue WHAT you're on about or HOW to do it ...AT ALL!”
“So... what's the worst hand? The 7/2 off suit I have or the 9/2 off suit I can see the guy next to me has?”
3. Bold faced lie
A bold-faced lie, refers to a lie told with a straight and confident face (hence "bold-faced"), usually with the corresponding tone of voice and emphatic body language of one confidently speaking the truth. Bold-faced Lie can also refer to misleading or inaccurate newspaper headlines.
Or in the total truthzone...
“I have to tell you my expression and body language do give my words a gravitas they really don't deserve, cause I made up every single word!”
OUR NEWSPAPER HAS A POLITICAL SLANT THAT REFLECTS THE VIEWS OF OUR OWNER AND ADVERTISERS SO PLEASE DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU READ (oh and the Bingo is fixed).
4.Contextual lie
One can state part of the truth out of context, knowing that without complete information, it gives a false impression. Likewise, one can actually state accurate facts, yet deceive with them. To say "yeah, that's right, I ate ALL the peanut butter, ALL by myself" utilizing a sarcastic, offended tone, may cause the listener to assume the speaker was not making a confession, when in fact he was.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Yeah, that's right, I never tell the truth when I'm talking like this”
5. Economical with the truth
Economical with the truth is popularly used as a euphemism for deceit, whether by volunteering false information or by deliberately holding back relevant facts. More literally, it describes a careful use of facts so as not to reveal too much information. People commonly use truth economies when trying to get a motorist to run an unexpected errand...which is always seemingly going to take a couple of minutes of their time.
Or in the total truthzone...
“It's not five minutes down the road... well it is should you have a helicopter, but seeing this is an urban area we are talking about the least rewarding twenty minutes anyone will spend in their car, oh and once you get there the parking is a bitch”
6. Emergency lie
An emergency lie is a strategic lie told when the truth may not be told because a third party is present and it is desired for that person not to know about the subject under discussion. Commonly used in the presence of a child or a person for whom an unexpected event is planned.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Yes, we managed to get all the shopping done for [third parties name]'s surprise birthday party, I can't WAIT to see his surprised face on the night!”
7. Exaggeration
An exaggeration occurs when the most fundamental aspects of a statement are true, but only to a certain degree. It is also seen as "stretching the truth" or making something appear more powerful,enjoyable, terrible, meaningful, or real than it actually is.Often used when a host asks you what they thought of their event. “Oh Frank's party was the best!... it was GREAT!”
Or in the total truthzone...
“Franks party was an okay use of my Saturday night”
8. Fabrication
A fabrication is a lie told when someone submits a statement as a truth, without knowing for certain whether or not it actually is true. Although the statement may be possible or plausible, it is not based on fact. But in defense of my countrymen, most people in England tell complete fabrications because we'd die of embarrassment if we told the truth! A common example of fabricating would be when a person giving directions to a tourist when the person doesn't actually know the directions himself, and political propaganda is another common use of fabrication.
Or in the total truthzone...
“ I have no idea where Buckingham Palace is from here, but that's because we're in Birmingham...”
“Okay, my government hasn't a clue what it is doing, but I'm in charge and that job comes with a great house so yes... I'll keep lying to you so I can keep it a bit longer”
9. Jocular lie
Jocular lies are lies meant in jest, intended to be understood as such by all present parties. A more elaborate instance is seen in some storytelling traditions, where the humour comes from the storyteller's insistence that the story is the absolute truth, despite all evidence to the contrary. Urban myths are part of this hertiage.
Or in the total truthzone...
“There was no dead rat in my KFC, no one got a pubic lice in their eye after being hit by a strippers panties, and no one really does find Carol Voderman sexy”
10. Lie to children
A lie-to-children is a lie, which is told to make an adult subject acceptable to children. Common examples include lies to children in reference to childbirth and the existence of Santa, the Tooth Fairy or the Easter Bunny.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Well children.... your mother got heinously drunk and forced me to have wild and possibly unnatural sex with her on your grandma's banquette...yes, the one you are sitting on now...”
11. Lying by omission
One lies by omission when omitting an important fact, deliberately leaving another person with a misconception. Propaganda is often an example of lying by omission. Lying by omission includes failures to correct pre-existing misconceptions. An example is when an estate agent highlights the proximity to the commuter services but not the frequency of the freight trains after midnight.
Or in the total truthzone...
YES...it's a lovely flat, and easy to get to the station in the mornings however the hourly night freight trains will shake your fillings out at night”
12. Lying in trade
The seller of a product or service may advertise untrue facts about the product or service in order to gain sales. Mascara advertisements regularly are pulled up for claiming they can give the enhanced look you see on screen which are actually achieved with the use of false eyelashes.
Or in the total truthzone...
“This product guarantees that lashes WILL look fuller but not in a good way; it just looks like you have applied too much mascara.”
13. Lying through your teeth
When one lies face-to-face with the intended recipient. This type of lie can be simply done with tone of voice but isn't always verbal and can be communicated costume or body language. For example.. you are in hospital...you ask the lady in a white coat if you will live...and she shakes her head. You assume you are going to die.
Or in the total truthzone...
“I'm not your doctor...I got the white coat from the girl on the Clinique counter at Boots”
14. Misleading/dissembling
A misleading statement is one where there is no outright lie, but still retains the purpose of getting someone to believe in an untruth. "Dissembling" likewise describes the presentation of facts in a way that is literally true, like naming a university and saying you went there for three years to intentionally mislead an employer to think you have a degree from there.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Actually I went to the London School of Economics for three years at lunchtime to buy prawn sandwiches from their canteen – I wasn't a student or anything”
15. Noble lie
A noble lie is one that would normally cause discord if uncovered, but offers some benefit to the liar and assists in an orderly society, therefore, potentially beneficial to others. It is often told to maintain law, order and safety. Like telling unruly youths that you can see police coming in order to disperse the crowd.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Carry on everyone... no one's getting in trouble with the law today!”
16. Perjury
Perjury is the act of lying or making verifiably false statements on a material matter under oath or affirmation in a court of law, or in any of various sworn statements in writing. Perjury is a crime, because the witness has sworn to tell the truth and, for the credibility of the court to remain intact, witness testimony must be relied on as truthful.
Or in the total truthzone...
“I swear on this holy book to tell the truth...so I better let you know now that Johnny's me hubby and there is no way I want him serving time, so even though he did it and the swag is under our bed, I'm saying he was home with me all night...OK?”
17. Puffery
Puffery is an exaggerated claim typically found in advertising and publicity announcements, such as "the highest quality at the lowest price." Such statements are unlikely to be true - but cannot be proven false; especially as the consumer is expected to be able to tell that it is not the absolute truth.
Or in the total truthzone...
“No... we did not mop up that spill with one sheet... more like one roll, but you knew that cause it's the same round your house when you knock a drink over”
18. What lie
What lie is the use of a disingenuous statement made by pretending that one knows less about a situation than one really does. Typical example would be a politician saying that his government was not part of a decision making process...only for wiki leaks to prove that they were knee deep in the decision making process.
Or in the total truthzone...
“We had a choice, cheap oil for the living and British or expensive incarceration of a terrorist whose victims are dead and foreign – so we did the deal”
19. White lie
White lies are minor lies which could be considered to be harmless, or even beneficial, in the long term but sometimes can be harmful if they are used to give false hope. Example will be telling someone who has experienced difficulty that it is 'just a bump in the road' and all will be well soon.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Sometimes a setback is a sign to stop”
20. Whopper
A lie which attempts to trick the victim into believing something major which will likely be contradicted by some information the victim already possesses, or by their common sense. When the lie is of sufficient magnitude it may succeed due to the victim's reluctance to believe that an untruth on such a grand scale would indeed be fabricated.An example of this is when a 'property developer' extols the virtues of a piece of land that you are sure is in fact a bog in Eire, but gives such a convincing pitch with audio visuals and positive feedback from other clients who have bought into it that you just can't help but override your own knowledge.
Or in the total truthzone...
“Actually it's a complete scam... but the commission i'm on is soooo fabulous I had to try to reel you in”
Thing is, we all lie. If you are about to say you never do... you've just told a whopper! We lie. We lie because we're scared of harm, conflict, punishment, rejection, loss...and occassionally we lie to help friends and loved ones.
I have no idea why we're all so crap about admitting we are all just big fat hairy liars! To be honest, lying is actually an admirable and useful social skill when we use it responsibly... but THAT'S not why we do it!...
mostly it works. And THAT my dear reader....is the Truth about Lies. The JaxWorld Blog can be followed on Twitter- http://twitter.com/#!/JaxWorldBlog If you enjoyed this blog and you want to contact Jax or find out more about the JaxWorld blog, pls log onto :http://thejaxworldblog.vpweb.co.uk/ Thanks for continuing to vote for JaxWorld as the Best Blog about Stuff and for ALL your support that has made this blog such a huge success. |
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